Social media channels are buzzing about an article in New York Magazine’s digital publication, The Cut. Written anonymously by a woman who recently had a baby, it details the cruel and inhumane way she treated her cat after the birth of her child.
Purpose of the Story, Versus Its Reality
The article is intended to show how people’s relationships with their pets change when they start a family. Instead, his treatment of his cat, Lucky, reveals a shocking lack of compassion for a living creature he once claimed to love. Forgetting to feed Lucky and give him water for a long time. Her litter box was left dirty so she was forced to relieve herself on the floor. He was left homeless and dirty. Leaving him without medical care for dental problems that developed after a poor diet.
The neglect was bad enough, but the pure anger and hatred he was expressing towards his former partner was heartbreaking. And it’s obvious how sad Lucky is every time he’s driven away by desperate requests for love. Despite the writer saying that cats, including Lucky, are not affectionate, Lucky clearly loves her. The cat does not understand what has changed. In fact, the writer talks about leaving the windows open in his apartment, hoping Lucky would jump or fall to his death.
This story was disturbing enough that several social media influencers tried unsuccessfully to identify the writer in an attempt to give Lucky a decent home. The Cut has a disclaimer at the beginning of the article saying that Lucky is okay and safe, but there is a lot of skepticism about that.
Who Are We When We Become Parents?
The truth is, your relationship with your pet – with everything, in fact – changes when you have a child. But your emotional core remains the same under all the stress, the long hours, and the new reality you’ve gotten yourself into without fully realizing the implications. If anything, it gets deeper. If you are a good person who has a loving relationship with those around you, you will continue to act in ways that flow through that love. Even the times when you miss them, or are irrationally angry with them because you lack sleep and your baby is screaming. Those moments when you have a millisecond of breathing room, you still know that love is there, and so are they.
Except for a very brief second at the end, the writer doesn’t show that.
Who This Writer Presents
During the article, you get the impression that the main reason she got Lucky was because she was a lonely single woman in her 20s. He wants something that loves him unconditionally (remember, not the other way around). At first he was surprised by her. He paid attention to Lucky. And Lucky has gotten used to sleeping on his head every night and benefiting from all of his person’s disposable income.
Naturally, after all this attention, Lucky becomes very attached to this girl, even though he claims that the cat is not a loving companion. So when the boyfriend-to-husband came along, Lucky became territorial. The woman dismissed this issue with, “It’s unpleasant but manageable for everyone.” No one is looking for ways to get Lucky to be more accepting of the new guy. There is no understanding of how changing relationship dynamics can disrupt the cat’s life. It makes me wonder if she really cared at all, or if Lucky was just a living, breathing toy, to be thrown aside when something newer came along.
So reading that, it’s no surprise that once a baby arrives, things will only get worse for Lucky. Yes, pets can suffer from benign neglect after children enter a family, but this woman’s tone leans toward cruelty. Postpartum Depression or maybe worse? Who knows, but the way he reacts to his cat is not healthy. Especially with Lucky.
The Story We Need
Yes, stories about pets changing status after babies are important. And this should be addressed to help new parents and let them know that they are not crazy or bad people if they don’t feel the same way about their pets after birth. But The Cut shouldn’t have run this story. It normalizes cruelty and lack of compassion. A person who truly loves their pet and has empathy would never treat an animal the way this writer treated Lucky.
Instead of writing an article about her hatred of a cat she once thought she loved, the writer should be seeking psychiatric attention. And finding Lucky a new home with someone who understands cats better than ever.